The media has been speculating for some weeks now about the reasons behind actor Aamir Khan’s latest hair snafu. If new sightings are to be relied on, it would seem that Khan’s strange hairstyle has, well, some rather unearthly origins. Masti Chaman, a freelance mural artist who was recently commissioned to pai nt Khan’s septic tank purple, approached us yesterday with some startling news. “I was cleaning my brushes in Aamir’s kitchen sink, when I heard a long, sustained wail coming from inside his garage. I’m the curious sort, you know, so I crept up and peeped in the door.” What Chaman saw would knock the skin off the hardiest journo’s knees. “Aamir was standing in the middle of the room, looking completely zonked. His eyes were open, and only the whites were showing. It was so eerie!” Oh but there’s more! “Suspended above his head was a small, spinning spacecraft. Even as I watched, a ladder popped out of the craft and a small green alien creature in tiny orange overalls stepped out onto Aamir’s head. The creature was carrying what looked like a small lawnmower. It then turned on the machine and started cropping patterns into Aamir’s scalp: strange heiroglyphics, not unlike the stuff you see on the walls of Egyptian pyramids or Aztec temples. Of course, I didn’t stick around to make sense of what was going on.I was terrified!” And rightly so.
“So I crept out the house and ran for my life!” We would have done the same, we assured Chaman. But the evidence is plain for all to see: Aamir Khan is an alien message board! Mumbai city, don’t say we didn’t warn you!
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